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It is difficult for me to write about my experience of yearning to lose weight, then losing weight throughout the last 2 years, and ultimately maintaining that weight loss.
I was constantly desiring freedom from my own litany of ‘mean talk’ and freedom from worrying about what others might think of me.
Negative thoughts were always running through my head. Years of being called names, direct or indirect insults, about me being not the right size started at a very early age.
It totally affected my self-esteem. So much so that it has made it hard to speak out or speak up when needed. I was born shy but my insecurity, and feeling like I would never be good enough or I have nothing important to say, was very much learned.
School can introduce us to many unkind peers. It can change who you are. Especially if you really don’t have a true understanding of your worth. We (you) are children of God. We have no reason or need to be insecure…but, that takes time, prayer and surrender to really learn and to live by.
You’re not overweight, you are just big-boned
You see, even though I have been considered overweight since childhood, you would never have described me that way. But, being overweight has always been at the forefront of my mind. Childhood jokes and criticism over ‘being fat’ just have a way of sticking with you. A voice that plays in your mind over and over again.
I am on the taller side (5’7″) and my weight is distributed fairly evenly over all of my body. People may have said that I needed to ‘lose a few pounds’ but that was it.
Still, I felt very uncomfortable and uneasy where my weight was concerned. It was on my mind daily. Never far from thought was the fact that I needed to lose weight.
In addition, my father had passed away at 56 due to unhealthy habits. This was not going to happen to me if I could help it. I knew I had to be responsible for my own health.
At 40, I had my youngest child. Then began the search to lose the baby weight again. I have had 9 babies and wanting and needing weight loss after each pregnancy was just part of my life. I also needed a way to get healthy – inside and out.
After wanting to lose weight and struggling and looking for an effective way to lose it for good, I finally made the discovery that brought me that long sought after freedom.
Continually praying daily to find a way that would work and work for good. I was just tired of getting up at 4 am to work out for 45 minutes, eat very little all day and not lose weight. It was not fair in my opinion and I needed something else, another way…
God, my loving Father, listened to my plea. You see he desired my weight loss & to heal me as much as I wanted to be healed.
It is little things like a past hurt, wound or unforgiveness that can paralyze us from doing what we were called to do.
God wanted me to help others wanting weight loss as much as he wanted to heal me.
As this passage came up, again and again, many times during my early morning prayer, I began to realize that maybe God was speaking to me. And before long I found out just what he was saying specifically to me. I surrendered to his helping hand.
Simple answer to wanting weight loss
It was my sisters that started talking to me about this new diet they heard of. It was called Keto. Little did I know that a simple conversation would lead to what has become a lifestyle. This change could not only help me lose my weight but ultimately heal my inflammation and give me a healthy body like I never have experienced – not even in young childhood.
This revelation began my search, study, and learning of a whole new way of living, eating, denying and taking control of my health. I devoured everything I could read, watch or listen to. I have learned so much. This little chapter of my life and journey has changed the way I approach not only my weight but my health and life.
Soon this Keto way of eating led me to fast also called Intermittent Fasting (IF). I never Imagined the long adhered to the practice of ‘fasting’ could help heal so much…but, it has and will. Keto and fasting just go hand in hand.
I am still on a journey and have a life and health to nourish and protect. I may not have power over the future, but I have the decision to do what I must today, now at this moment…
One of my favorite quotes from St. Augustine ~
This simple quote says it all! We are responsible and charged to take care of our bodies and souls…These few words have given me true freedom!
You simply cannot take care of one without the other. We are not just a body, nor are we just a spirt. We are truly both and that is how we need to look at it and take care of ourselves.
And as I share my journey, & why life begins with prayer and black coffee, I hope you will decide to join me!